Ramble 95: All I want for Christmas is…FOR YOU TO SHUT UP!

I wish I could yank these bloody humans across their face as hard as it gets. One hard meaty slap to show them their place. For them to just shut their big lips, fast track mouths with words running away like Usain Bolt. I just wish some people would shut up.


It was a hard day for me, to get my shameful sin-loving marks; showing me my worth. And there she was: in my face. I felt jealous to watch as a smile creep up her face. I tried really hard not to envy. But I couldn’t. And then it was the final straw: the slow raising of the eyebrows and my anger as fast as a bullet train. I told her “to get out of my face”. It was a politer way of telling her to FUCK OFF. Life never felt so good.

Then another math class, another dumb joke and my last snigger telling her to keep her pathetic little “doubts” to herself. Her good for nothing soul sucking evildoing little mind need not be present in the presence of those actually willing to study, or two anyways. And then she told me “to shut it or stay at home.” I wanted to tell her to shut up and open the book once in a while, to learn how to “play with numbers rather than those balls” but I didn’t. I shut my mouth like I was supposed to because all I would have done in, in reality, would have been horrid. I would have left a dirty track mark across her face, roll-blazed her skin as hard as it comes so that she would know how to and when to open her dirty little mouth.

And as I read back looking at my words, my vilification and vituperation, ALAS! life never felt so good. I would write it again, all over again but never would I once role-play in real life because sometimes, while all you want is humans to shut up you have to, too. As much as you would love to twist those tiny little ribbons hanging from their hair and gnaw that dumbfuck laugh, you have to stay put. And it is there that you realize that we all are just a nudge away from the human jungle.


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